So when are you going to get married?

This is a question I feel like we have answered quite a bit from family and friends over the past who knows how long. I guess it just is something where we don't feel like it must be done now, nor are we both really ready for us to make that commitment.

Probably should back up.


Damon and I met in the summer of 2010 at a dance event called Aspen Blues Recess. Basically, the event traveled around the Colorado Rockies in the vacinity of Aspen (though really not in Aspen proper), dancing and hanging out. It was definitely not love at first sight, as we both were interested at the time in other people. But we kept in touch and something grew out of it.

We kept in touch throughout the year via Google chat and texting. It fostered a really good relationship between us, as we had to talk, being that he was living in the Seattle area, while I was living in Bryan, Texas (if you don't know where this is, don't feel bad. It's the middle of nowhere).

He came down for a visit that spring, not only to see me, but some of our other friends in Austin. It was a good time just to spend time with each other and get to know each other. It was fun to see friends that we hadn't seen in a while. That was when things started making the shift from just friends into something amorphous that we didn't feel the need to define.

That summer, I drove back up to Colorado for Aspen Blues Recess again, this time with the intention to bring back the rest of my stuff from when I lived in Fort Collins. Damon was game enough to drive down with me after the event, which was our first (but not last) road trip. It was when we realized that Lucky likes tight spaces (he was along too), I can't drive nearly as long as Damon can, and I put off sleepeons when I nap in the car.

For my birthday that year, his parents were extremely generous and gave him some flight miles to come down and see me for my birthday weekend. That was a lot of fun just to spend time with him. I was shocked and amazed with the generosity of his family, as well as loving the time able to be spent together.

I lived for another year and a half after this in Texas, where we only saw each other at dance events where we both could attend. Some of those events were ones I was working, so Damon got the de facto job of managing the AJ. It was more time for us to spend getting to know each other and developing our communication.

And then, in 2013, came the decision to move up to Seattle. I had never set out to settle in Bryan, though I had put down some very strong roots. I had only planned on living for a few months in Texas, a minor transition, a waiting, a time to get some help and prepare until I could try an interview again in Utah. That didn't end up being the case. I spent just over three years in Texas, living in six different places throughout my time there. I gained a lot of experience and got to live close to one of my best friends. But it really was time to move on. We had decided that we really didn't like doing the long distance thing, since we didn't have the finances to see each other regularly. We had discussed different options, but the one that made the most sense was me to relocate to Seattle. He had family connections here, where I just had my best friend and church in Texas. My family is located in Oregon, so I am close enough to see them when I need to, but far enough away that I could retain my autonomy. We had never set out to have long distance relationship, but somehow it turned into that. And while I was able to give any number of reasons for leaving Texas, it really was for him. I wanted to see if we could make this work.

And we have. We have all but lived together for the past two plus years. We have found a rhythm that works for us. It fits us well. We both have things we would like to see the other develop before we are ready to make the commitment of marriage, but we both support each other in growing and developing.

Over the past few years, though, we get the question from family and friends, "So when are you going to get married?" We have always said, "Once we finish the PCT, we will think about it." It's one giant litmus test. Some say we are crazy. Some say we have a good plan. Either way, it's how we have decided to live our lives.